Henrik’s life-long depression disappeared

My sister told me about Qigong and since I trust her judgement, I decided to try it out. After a weekend course I started to attend group practice and it felt quite good from time to time. But the depression always caught up with me, the effect was not permanent. Even though I felt really bad I decided to attend the nine-day course last summer. It sounded tough, but I wanted to give it a chance. When I got there I felt depressed and if my sister would have told me that I would feel much better afterwards, I would probably have been very sceptical.

A long depression

At first I felt so terribly excluded, as I have since I was a small child. I think I have been depressed ever since I was diagnosed with diabetes at the age of two and a half. I was also bullied and rejected and as a result of this I have created my own fantasy world, where I felt safe. During my years of study in Uppsala, where I studied Antique Culture, Egyptology and Art History, I was well received, but I was still depressed the whole time. Fortunately I now hold a job which I really enjoy at the archive of the Army Museum.

Suddenly I could smile

Suddenly, while practising, I could feel something let go. It was as if a weight had been lifted off my shoulders and I could relax my face. I didn’t understand what was going on, because I had never experienced anything like it before. Suddenly I could smile and laugh. When I looked in the mirror and I didn’t recognise myself because I could smile. Someone also told me that I look both taller and happier. Earlier when we were told to relax “with a gentle smile” I didn’t know how to bring that about. I could just feel pain. Now the pain had suddenly disappeared and I also noticed that my fantasy worlds were gone with the wind. I didn’t need any world to escape to for the first time in as long as I can remember. It was an amazing experience!

I hardly notice the back injury I have suffered from since a biking accident a year ago. Earlier it would torment me when I went to bed. My shoulders don’t bother me that much either and I think the pain will disappear completely. My memory is longer and my blood sugar has been stable. When I last visited the diabetes nurse, she told me that the difference was substantial compared to how I used to be.

The summer course also had a significant social impact on me. I talked to many participants and I have learned to communicate in a way I simply couldn’t before. Then I could only discuss specific topics and I had to know the person well in order to dare to talk. I feel completely reborn. From my first course to the summer course exactly nine months passed! Henrik succeeded to get rid of his depression by practicing Zhineng Qigong.

Henrik Gyllenram